Gabriela's ITP Thesis Project

Thank you All!

2005-05-09T11:34:00.000-07:00

One thing I regret about the presentation was that I was not able to adequately thank everyone who I meant to, as the time went by so quickly, and one gets swept away with the excitement of it all.

However, I cannot wrap up this project without thanking some people who were so integral to the process of it!

Special Thanks goes out to....

-My Family, whose support spans a lifetime.... I love you all! Thanks for the talks, the emails, the connections and the love!

-My Friends: thank you for assisting me in every way, for giving some of your time to helping me put things together (you know who you are), and for giving me those wonderful words of encouragement, as well as serving as moral support whether at the show or every step of the way!

-My boss and my coworkers: thank you for being so supportive in my efforts to get my degree, and for all of the positive encouragement!

-Luke and Heather: thanks for being my teachers, and providing your ideas, your wisdom and your intellect. Luke, thanks especially for letting me pick your brain every now and then.

-My classmates: you guys are amazing! I have gotten to know most of you better, and I am truly amazed by your talents and your generosity!

-The Tech Staff, the staff, and the Administrators at ITP: I have to extend my thanks to you for helping me grow along the way, and for lending me your expertise and your facilities and your support.

AND, MOST OF ALL, I have to thank all of the women and young ladies who volunteered their time to let me document some of their most intimate, personal and, at times, emotional experiences in regards to their hair. I appreciate all of your stories, and all of your wisdom. Thank you for opening your hearts and voices for me.

Jitter Patch Woes

2005-05-03T11:47:00.000-07:00

I continued to have problems with the Jitter patch because the PIC sends MIDI signals in a fast-paced manner over and over, that tends to reset the signals. I used a "change" object, but this would not account for the multiple movies that needed to trigger. Thus, I ended up having to work with Luke, who was extremely helpful in assisting me with setting up an equation to deal with the multiple levels of triggering I needed.

However, another issue surfaced soon after, which was that I could not use the fact that the touch sensors being held down would trigger the movie. The problem with this is that they do not send a signal for more than 20 seconds because they eventually equalize (see post on this). Thus, I had to change the patch back again, so that they only triggered the videos, but duration was not the catalyst for keeping them running.

Touch eventually "Equalizes"

2005-05-02T10:09:00.000-07:00

One of the more problematic and unexpected findings with my project was discovered shortly before having to present it at the Live Image Processing show on Friday, April 29th. This was when I discovered that the touch sensors eventually stop sending a signal to the PIC chip, even when held. Since my project's interaction was supposed to depend on whether the touch sensors are being held or not, this came as quite a disappointment, and I had to alter the Jitter Patch to compensate for it. Today, I spoke with a representative at Digikey who informed me that the human charge and the touch sensor's charge "eventually equalizes," meaning that purchasing another kind of touch sensor will not solve the problem. Thus, I have to alter the interface similar to what I did for the Live Image Processing show, in the sense that touch triggers the videos, which will eventually expire (through a timer prompted by Jitter when touched) if one does not continue to caress the hair intermittently throughout the experience. Additionally, I have decided to splice the videos into smaller bits for this reason as well as for conceptual reasons, listed previously.

Seeing it all changes Perspective

2005-05-01T18:24:00.000-07:00

The Live Image Processing show, which occurred last Friday, April 29th, went very well overall, and featured many fascinating projects. It was also the first time that I was able to view my own at a distance, with others interacting with it in various ways. One thing that I noticed was that multiple people wanted to see its capabilities at the same time, but the narratives ran for several minutes (which can seem like hours during a show). I had edited the videos down from over half an hour each (in most cases) to about four minutes, but viewing it in a show experience made me realize that the narratives had to be shorter, because, many times, others would come and interact with the piece, and interrupt a narrative that another individual was immersed in. I, purposely, did not want the narrative to start where it left off because I was anticipating various individuals coming in at different points and wanting to see it from the beginning. Additionally, there are several possible narratives that can come up for one hair choice, meaning that the next time one hair style is touched, a different narrative may begin. However, this caused a good amount of frustration for many viewers, who, for the most part, just stayed and stood back, hoping for a time when they could hear that one narrative again.

I was approached by some friends and family who had viewed the piece and they recommended that I cut down each of the individual narratives into two or more smaller parts that begin with different parts of the dialogue. I have decided that I will do this before the thesis presentation, and discuss some of the pros and cons to adopting this kind of approach.

The Politics of Buying Hair

2005-04-17T22:09:00.000-07:00

It wasn't until I had to purchase hair that I realized the extent of the politics involved. As a black woman, I have always known that purchasing hair in some form, whether it was real or not (but especially if it wasn't) was a source of shame, with the exception sometimes being if you were purchasing extensions for hair braiding (because this allowed the braid to hold for a longer amount of time). So, as I was looking for the right synthetic wigs at the right price, the experience became a multidimensional one -- I realized that most of my fellow shoppers would come in and out quickly, and try not to stare at the wigs for too long. Many times they would look through the hair care sections when too many people not buying wigs would come into the store. Two of the fellow wig buyers I noticed were wearing a baseball cap, with thinning hair peaking out underneath; one of the other ones wore a wig herself and was less ashamed in the process, and spoke openly with the clerks, who also appeared to wear wigs or extensions, and spoke with what sounded like a West African accent. When I did start inquiring about some of the wigs, who were all given female names, I could tell that the clerks as well as my fellow wig or hair care shoppers would examine the hair on my head at a distance, trying to determine, presumably, if my bun was real or an add-on, or if I needed a wig. I found myself doing the same when I saw younger girls coming in the store, looking for extensions.

I also found that it was hard to find really curly wigs, or wigs with braids or locks. Many of the curly wigs had bigger, looser curls that usually hung down in a wavy pattern, not sticking out to the sides or above the brow line, like really kinky or curly hair would. I asked about wigs with dreadlocks, which I had seen once before a couple weeks back when I was looking, and the clerks looked at me in a strange way, then one of them inquired with who appeared to be the head manager, who stated that they did not carry these kinds of wigs. I asked about wigs that contained braids, and they had only one that contained crimson-dyed braids that were unraveled (as part of a style) and the emphasis was not on the braids, but on the lose, wavy hair, which made up most of the wig. I was able to find one really curly style wig, but this was an Afro wig, and I was a little apprehensive about the purchase, but, being as it was one of my only options for curlier hair, I went ahead with it.

If I could afford the more expensive wigs, which contained real hair, I would have purchased them because part of my project is to defy the myths about curly hair texture, which is usually thought of as coarse and brillo-like, though that is typically far from the truth. However, using synthetic wigs can only add to the myth because they really do feel dry and coarse. I assume this is something I should talk about during my session when I bring up future versions of this project.

However, as I left some of the stores, I would get looks, and sometimes comments that I could not understand. As I passed three women sitting on lawn chairs outside of a storefront, they all looked at me displeased, and said words under their breath. One of them jumped up and started telling me, in a very animated way, that I did not need to "do this" (referring to my black bags, whose contents she must have known from a distance, particularly since they were pretty hidden inside). She was very upset, as if I had committed a crime by buying these things. I tried to explain to her that this was for a project, and it wasn't for me to wear, but instead she told me that I should just go and get my hair done, because they could give me all of these styles and make them look more natural. I took her card, and thanked her, but then turned the corner into another wig shop, looking for my locked or braided wigs, certain that she was shaking her head outside.

My stepfather's comments

2005-04-15T21:35:00.000-07:00

I was very delighted to received an email from my stepfather, one of the closest parental figures in my life, who has cared for me since I was a child. He is also a white man, so it was very interesting to hear his comments on the subject.

"> Sounds great. I learned things I had not
> understood about the interactions between you and mom about hair when
> you were a kid. I was fairly oblivious at the time.
>
> About the statement, my suggestion is that it would be good to give
> the issue of touch some more treatment in the personal statement or
> background
> stage. Touch comes in as key to the project under
> the technical description, but isn't mentioned before.
>
> For any artistic subject, touch may be useful as a way to "touch" the
> viewer more personally, vs.
> looking. But, do you also suggest that touch has particular
> significance for the topic of hair? I tend to think of the cultural
> significance of hair as mainly an issue of how it looks, not about
how

> it feels when you touch it. Hair that is curly, esp.
> with tight curls, looks larger than straight hair and by taking more
> physical space, may raise touch
> as a larger issue. Touching hair with tight curls
> feels diferent than touching smooth hair, it has more resistance, it
> holds it shape.
>

Worked it out ... with the PIC

2005-04-13T10:18:00.000-07:00

So, it appears that I have finally solved one of my major problems on the pic (chip) side. After a few nights of frustration, I finally have cleaned up my code such that it is only reading in MIDI signals from one switch at a time. Previously, my code was reading that one switch (attached to one of the pins of my pic) was turned on, but also reading that the others were turned off, and sending those messages as well. I was able to do some cleaning up with a repeat loop, but it wasn't as short as I hoped it would be. I still had to use a lot of conditional (if/then) statements, but, at least I was able to finally have it such that one corresponding light would go on and one MIDI signal would be transmitted.

So far, I have been able to successfully read in these signals with the MIDI monitor (into my Mac), but I am having problems on the Jitter side, which I hope to work out with my teacher. It appears that I keep getting some kind of port error, so I can't receive signals serially. There must be some kind of setup that I am missing.

Plus-Size Pantyhose...

2005-04-11T14:17:00.000-07:00

Over the weekend, I made it my mission to purchase as many supplies as I could to start "fleshing-out" the mannequin heads, both aesthetically and functionally for my installation. I purchased copper-mesh at Utrecht to create a grid of capacitance on the scalps (I will probably also have to run some hidden copper wire inside some of the strands of hair).

I also had to make a stop over at Big K to grab some pantyhose to place over the stark-white Styrofoam heads (at the suggestion of one of my classmates - I like the subtlety of this over painting the faces directly or leaving them white). I realized that the pantyhose had to be pretty wide to fit over the heads, and found myself in the plus-size section, seeking out the largest "Queen"-size pantyhose I could! I was disappointed to find, however, that there are only a few kinds (off-black, nude, tan) in almost every brand, and I wasn't going to start venturing into the expensive ones for this purpose. Despite it all, the pantyhose ended up looking pretty good on the mannequin heads!

For Loops

2005-04-11T14:01:00.000-07:00

I tested out my Pic code last week when I met with Luke, my Jitter teacher, and he noticed that the MIDI signal was not consistent with any of the pins (I have five switches attached to five input pins in my code). Today, I decided to use "MIDI Monitor," a program that allows you to monitor the MIDI signals coming in, to dissect what the direct problem is. I noticed that it seemed to be cycling through all five pin states, sending four note-off signals and one note-on, despite which switch was pushed. I came to the conclusion that this is because I have all of my code in conditional statements for each switch (I know that this should be avoided -- I just wanted to see if I could successfully send MIDI-out before I got too ambitious).

Thus, I created three arrays to hold all 5 switch states, all 5 pitch (MIDI-out) states and all 5 LED states (I have LEDs turning on on corresponding output pins). They are all being initiated by a for loop, which will go through all five, and triggered by a count variable, which can be passed to any of the three arrays. This seems like the best solution, and I am fairly confident it will work.

All in One

2005-04-10T13:14:00.000-07:00

I am very happy that I purchased the MIDISport Uno midi-cable & interface all in one, which connects via USB. It has been a tremendous help through streamlining the process into my mac. I wasn't sure what I was looking for (this being my first time working with MIDI), but, it has been a lifeline since purchasing it for a little over $30 from Amazon... I highly recommend it for those of you possible looking for something comparable.

Thorough Bibliography (so far)

2005-04-08T09:41:00.000-07:00

I know that so far, I have only placed bits and pieces of my bibliography online. However, now I am placing all that I am currently reading, reviewing and researching on the subject to date.

African American Hair in Art:
Sieber, Roy. Hair in African art and culture
Ojeikere, J. D. J.D. Okhai Ojeikere photographs
Niedzialek, Terry. Terry Niedzialek, Hair sculpture and Its Roots
Simpson, Lorna. Lorna Simpson: Works

Pyschology of Touch:
Dresslar, Fletch. Studies in the psychology of touch
Montagu, Ashley. Touching : the human significance of
Kusajima, Tokisu. Visual reading and braille reading

Sociology of Black Hair:
Blackwelder, Julie. Styling Jim Crow: African American Beauty Training During Segregation
Pamela Johnson, et al. Tenderheaded : A Comb-Bending Collection of Hair Stories
Ebong, Ima and A'Lelia Perry Bundles. Black Hair : Art, Style, and Culture
Ingrid Banks. Hair Matters: Beauty, Power, and Black Women's Consciousness
Noliwe M. Rooks. Hair Raising: Beauty, Culture, and African American Women
Mastalia, Francesco, et al. Dreads
Ayana Byrd, Lori Tharps. Hair Story : Untangling the Roots of Black Hair in America
Noliwe M. Rooks. Ladies' Pages: African American Women's Magazines and the Culture That Made Them
Patricia Hill Collins. Black Sexual Politics

Hair Styling:
Collison, Michel. It's all good hair: the guide to styling
Love, Toni. The world of wigs, weaves and extensions
Gittens, Sandra. African-Caribbean hairdressing
Bonner, Lonnice. Plaited Glory : For Colored Girls Who've Considered Braids, Locks, and Twists

Articles On-line:
1. Exploring mathematical patterns in braiding: http://www.math.buffalo.edu/mad/special/gilmer-gloria_HAIRSTYLES.html
2. Article on the Politics of Hair: http://www.naani.com/off_the_top_of_your_head.htm
3. More articles on that same site: http://www.naani.com/
4. General Site with tons of links to other sites to explore: http://www.modernmuslima.com/beauty.htm

Pic Programming and Hair Pulling

2005-04-07T20:59:00.000-07:00

On Monday and Tuesday night, I swallowed up my "free" time with PIC programming in the PComp lab. Still working off of my weekend "high" with starting the MIDI circuit, I wanted to see how much I could finish before the week's end. Of course, this being my first time having to create a MIDI circuit and then program it (on a PIC no less!), I was sure that at some stage in the game, I would encounter some serious problems. Well, luckily, those said problems happened to happen on Monday and Tuesday night, weeks before I would need to hand in any sort of final product. While I carefully crafted my circuit and scrutinized the notes on programming the PIC for MIDI out, I must have overlooked the section on changing my configurations from "XT" to "HS" in the epic programmer window. I was careful about making sure I had a 20Mhz oscillator, and used "Hserout" in the programming code (instead of serout), but I know by now, after almost three years in this program, that there will be at least SOMETHING wrong, SOMEWHERE (I definitely can say that being at ITP for this long has sharpened my debugging and troubleshooting skills).

Thus, I was able to have my circuit working in the sense that my PIC can take in 5 input switches, and send out MIDI data serially to the MAC, as well as turn on 5 lights on corresponding output pins (to indicate that it is indeed sending something). However, after speaking with Luke Dubois, my Live Image Processing teacher, on Wednesday, I came to discover that, while there is MIDI information transmitting to the Mac, the signals aren't totally consistent, and I have to message some things to make sure that it sends a steady stream, instead of a sometimes interrupted one.

So, at this point, I guess I know what I will spend my weekend doing!

Building the MIDI circuit

2005-04-04T13:22:00.000-07:00

All last weekend (read: Saturday AND Sunday), while it poured outside, I decided to lock myself inside, finding it the perfect time to start putting some action into the steps involved with creating and executing a MIDI circuit, something I have been dreading since first conceiving of this project. The other parts of the process are familiar, and, thus, easy, in my mind, allowing me to push them to the last minute, mentally, without breaking a sweat. The Jitter patch and the MIDI circuit are the parts that come close to giving me ulcers just thinking about them (well, it hasn't come to this point, yet...).

In any event, I started building the circuit at home, with what parts I had accessible from former projects and collected parts. I took a break only to eat, and to rush over to meet up with Mike, my classmate, to discuss our thesis paper outlines and documentation (which, by the way, was very helpful)... then it was back to more circuit building at ITP. Sunday was more of the same, except there were no major breaks, and I lost an hour due to moving the clocks forward.

However, the whole process, while depriving me of much-desired TV and recreation time, did ease my racing nerves, since I was able to get a better handle on serial connection with MIDI. I was able to design my circuit (using the older double inverted model, however, but I will probably rearrange the circuit to fit the "simplified" model), and get a better handle of the concepts involved in setting up the communication, and programming the PIC.

So, I have conquered MIDI step 1 (building) and now I have to enter step 2 (programming the PIC), so I can start conceptualizing and building the Jitter component.

For the past three days, I have kind of been in a frenzy, acting as if it is the week before thesis presentation. Partly, I feel like I want to finish it early, because the process is so new to me and I want to make sure that I have a large portion of time to work on getting out the bugs (and I am sure there will be a few of them). Also, I want to make sure that I have time to really put the effort and thoughts into my thesis paper that I feel it deserves. While I have been working hard on the outline and research, I am still kind of all over the place in terms of compiling the written material, and, allowing at least 2 weeks to really work through it would be great.

Thus, I have taken some big steps forward, technically, and I have many more to take before I will totally get there, but I am glad that I am at least moving along.

Meeting with Mike

2005-04-03T12:05:00.000-07:00

Yesterday (Saturday), I met with my classmate Mike, and we went over our thesis paper outlines, as well as how to put together documentation for our work. I really enjoyed and got a lot out of his comments. He was very helpful in catching me up with the class I had missed the previous week, as well as making me a new copy of the guidelines, since my own had somehow disappeared.... It was interesting to hear how his project has changed shape. I was also interested to hear how he had noticed an incident where my thesis helped inform him of the context. He told me that he had heard a verbal exchange between two women who were comparing their hair in terms that he would have never previously noticed or understood. Things like that are always good to hear since I am hoping that those interacting with my project will also walk away with that context....

Thesis Tasks ... Don't Panic!

2005-03-31T13:15:00.000-08:00

As I think about all that needs to be accomplished in the next FOUR weeks, it is hard not to panic. I realize that I have done a lot of research and filming thus far, so I should feel a sense of accomplishment, especially since I have been sticking to my schedule, but all I feel right now is a sense of panic as I look over all that needs to be completed. My idea now is to try to go into overdrive, and give the same amount of spunk into my project as if I were in the final days before thesis week. I really want to get as much as possible done early, especially since I am, in a sense, biting off more than I can chew. Most of what I am attempting to build and create involves using programs and/or technology I am not as familiar with. For example, I learned physical computing with the BX-24, but for the purpose of serially connecting to Jitter, I will be using the PIC, which I have only briefly used once before for a short project. This will be my first time doing serial to Jitter completely on my own, since this is the first time that I am learning Jitter (for the last project with Jitter, I focused mainly on designing the interface and building the circuit, as well as testing the touch sensors with the physical interface -- my group partner worked on the Jitter programming). However, I am very familiar with the “in’s and out’s” of working with touch sensors. I have learned my lesson, and there will be lots of Co-Ax cable involved in the build, along with a ton of properly placed copper mesh. Video editing is turning out to be the easiest part of the process.

However, I have to commend myself for getting the interviews sooner than expected, and being ahead of schedule when it comes to video editing.

I feel that the whole ITP experience involves grasping something totally new and challenging and push your knowledge beyond the limits to create something amazing. I think that that's exactly what I am trying to do with this project, technologically. I am very confident that I can do this, and, not just do this period, but do it very well. I just wish I could take the panic out of the equation.

Here is a series of tasks that I need to complete for Thesis Final Project:

1. Video Editing
2. Build the Physical MIDI circuit
3. Program the PIC for MIDI
4. Make the serial Jitter Patch
5. Combine it together with test buttons
6. Build the circuit interface
7. Test Circuit out with touch sensors
8. Attach touch sensors to physical circuit interface
9. Viola!

The Weight of Hair

2005-03-25T14:24:00.000-08:00

The interesting thing is that we are all concerned about our jobs. Many of the women have asked me where this will be seen. They don't mind putting it on film, as long as that means that my audience will not consist of anyone from their place of business. I think this serves as a powerful indicator of the weight that our hair has on our heads.

...Actually, another filming session...

2005-03-25T14:18:00.000-08:00

Today, I was able to convince a coworker to put her story on film. Ideally, I would have liked to have the session at my place, because I think she may have felt slightly inhibited since it was happening in her office. However, it was good to get the "career woman's" perspective. It is very interesting because I have received a variety of responses from women, but the women who are the most successful in "traditional" careers are those that have chosen to straighten their hair. So, is there really a correlation there?

Getting it all on Tape...again.... and final?

2005-03-21T12:33:00.000-08:00

I held a shoot last Sunday, once again, hoping to capture as many stories on film as I possibly could. At first, I only had a few individuals lined up to shoot, and, even then, I wasn't sure of their availability, since it was in a "wait-and-see" state. However, I was pleasantly surprised to see that so many other women were willing to help me out, as if the subject itself had burst forth a plethora of generosity and community spirit. At the last minute, one of my neighbors, upon finding out that I could not find women with braids to interview, invited over one of her friends and that friend's child, who also has braids, to volunteer their time and their stories to my project. They were so inviting that they also let me film my neighbor's husband getting his hair done by the woman who volunteered her perspective (she is a very skilled hair braider as well).

In addition, my boyfriend's nieces were generous enough to come by and share their stories as well. I am always amazed at how intelligent and perceptive teenagers and children are. The young girl with braids, as well as my boyfriend's two teenaged neices, were so observant, insightful and articulate. It makes me realize how much adults belittle the abilities of the young.

And, I think that the interviews also brought to light the answer to the question I was pondering only a little while back: braids are not necessarily unpopular anymore, but I think that many black women are trying to explore other aspects of their hair choice. Ten years ago (let's say mid-90s), it would be shocking to see a woman with her hair in a curly fro, which is quite the style right now in pop-culture (not necessarily in the office, especially outside of a metropolis or college campus), but it wouldn't be too hard to find braids. However, while braids (and even to an extent, locks) have a way of, depending on the perspective, emulating long, straight hair, they also can carry negative assumptions as well, since much of the braiding process requires extensions (althought cornrows may not), and it still comes from a long tradition of African hair culture and style. There is still an element of acceptance for children, as I have read in many texts, mainly because it is looked at a traditional style for children of all races (in different forms, of course, since for many white children, this takes on the form of pigtails). However, when adopting styles for adults, there are other representations that come into the mix. I have to research this more before I articulate it clearly, but it is definitely within the realm of styles that we as black women are hesitant to accept, especially for the workplace.

Are Braids out of Style???

2005-03-18T13:07:00.000-08:00

For some reason, it has been extremely hard to find someone I can interview with braids. No one in my circle has worn braids since the late 90s, and I have noticed that the large-scale braiding shops on 125th are a thing of the past: they have given way to smaller boutique-style shops that take a few clients. I am wondering if braiding is going out of style... well, at least for now... possibly in favor of styles that were once feared to experiment with, like locks and natural hair worn out in free-form. I remember when braids were the most accepted way to express a form of "natural" hair.

Getting it on Tape ... Part I

2005-03-14T12:23:00.000-08:00

So, last Saturday (March 12th), myself, my good friends, and one of my neighbors got together to film our experiences, and became sisters in spirit in the process. It became like a therapy session, where some people opened up for the first time, or became aware of their own experiences in a new light, or questioned their own views, or became exposed to others. It was quite a beautiful and insightful bonding experience, which brought up a new set of questions for me... questions about cultural experience, how where you live affects you, and your age, confidence and awareness... I loved having all of the stories shared, and it ended up taking longer than I expected because everyone was so generous in what they exposed of themselves. It was very beautiful. I wanted so much to keep the camera rolling because some of the most honest confessions and discussions happened after the tape ran out and the camera was off.

This project has brought me so much closer to myself and my own identity in so many ways, while also opening the doors to others. I never thought that having experiences shared on film would be so easy... I really felt that I would have more protests.

Many more have volunteered and I will have another session soon... I realize that many of those I have interviewed are those that are well exposed to the "hair" issue, and have started to embrace their hair, no matter what -- those who have experienced several transformations with their hair, and have, in their adult years, embraced natural hair, in many cases, after having had straight (relaxed) hair for most of their youth.

I realize that I have yet to have an interview with someone who straightens their hair, whether it is a newer transformation or a lifelong choice, both of which open several avenues of discussion... I also am curious how to find someone who braids his or her hair, since no one in my circle has adopted that hairstyle of late. In fact, it seems to me that braiding was the "natural" hair style of choice several years back (in the mid-to-late nineties) when Brandi was all the rage, and when fewer people were embracing the curly fro or locks, like they seem to be now, at least in NYC.

One thing that I have also realized is that I am mostly interviewing NYC women, who find themselves in an environment that prides itself in cultural diversity, if only on the surface. Being able to have diverse styles and eclectic individuals is one of the biggest draws for people all around the country and the world. Because of this pull, many people have found this to be a haven of acceptance, even if only providing the appropriate enclaves for expression, and I feel that this in itself can skew a look into the microcosm of black women's experience with hair when mostly New Yorkers are used.

After shooting, it was very interesting because we all started talking about our childhood hair ideologies, and, despite the age difference, we all remember the same vivid memories of wearing some kind of prop on our heads to resemble flowing, straight hair that we could shake around in the air. My neighbor, who is in her fifties (I believe) said that she remembered that she and her friends used to put soft sweaters on their heads to resemble hair that could be swished from side to side. My friends and I (who are all in our mid-to-late 20s) laughed and remembered similar situations where we tried to emulate white-defined hair. That was very interesting.

However, where are we now? Does this mean we are "over" the hair issues? I hardly think so at all. We, in our circle, may have redefined what we think is beautiful, but I look outside my window into what is considered one of the biggest African-American Meccas in the world - Harlem - and most of what I see is straight hair, and most of what I hear is "good" hair/"bad" hair... I definitely feel that we are making progress... We are further in terms of defining ourselves, and, what one of my friends stated as "the only thing we can change" (i.e., our hair) in our own terms, in its own state, but I think it is still something that is always on our minds, always deep in our personal definition, and a contemporary topic of deep contention, reflection and dialogue.

My Midterm Presentation

2005-03-09T11:45:00.000-08:00

This is the midterm presentation that I showed to my thesis class on Tuesday, March 8th. Please use the "right arrow" and "left arrow" keys to scroll through the presentation.

(It may take a while to load!)

Midterm Presentation Time

2005-03-06T08:55:00.000-08:00

It's time to think about how best to present all of this at this stage of development. While most of my initial work has been reading and research, it is now time to start piecing everything together. I am actually supposed to have already started taping, but I have yet to organize a solid time for all of my friends to come by and volunteer their time and personal experiences. However, I have given myself enough of a margin so that I can have it all filmed and edited by the end of March. I am pretty confident that I should be able to do this.

On the technology side, I am also finding myself in a place of great challenge because I am new to Jitter and working with MIDI via the PIC. However, I have a lot of confidence in myself because if I could do similarly challenging work as a first year student in the span of one semester, I can do so now.

I have already started thinking out the technical aspects of my board, as well as researching and getting tips from Tom Ainslie, whom I worked with last semester, on the MIDI side of things. I am very familiar with the ins and outs of touch sensors, so that should probably be the easiest part of this whole thing for me (in other words, keep those suckers as far away from each other as possible, and use nothing but really good co-ax cable to hook them up)! I am looking forward to the challenge, and I hope this all flows in the best possible direction in the end).

Thinking Technically

2005-03-04T11:47:00.000-08:00

I have started researching how I plan to put the project together technically, and I have decided that I will connect a PIC through a MIDI interface into Jitter. Thus, I will need the following tools in order to complete my project:

1. Breadboard (Check)
2. PIC Chip (Check)
3. MIDI Cable (purchasing the USB version)
4. 20 MHZ powered oscillator (purchasing through DigiKey)
5. Touch Sensors (Q-Prox) - (purchasing through Digikey)
6. Co-Ax Cable (for the finicky touch sensors! - check!)
7. the Hair (varied rates on 125th Street)

Then on the other side of the technical spectrum, I have to film! I am finding more and more that this is going to be the hardest part conceptually, because there is so mcuh to say, and I have to find that "right" interaction that will capture all that I wish to say, without being too overdrawn or overcondensed.

So, I think, for now, I will go with my thesis instructor (Heather)'s idea to capture my group of friends and I interacting with our hair in an intimate space, and grow from there, if time allows. I also have proposed capturing footage from people getting their hair braided on 125th. Also, Heather suggested that I may want to contact MoHair and see if they will allow me to videotape them working with their clients.

I think I will attempt all three and see what works out the best. However, I think the best footage will happen in the intimate space, or, so I hope!

Black Hair on the Web

2005-03-01T10:34:00.000-08:00

I decided to so a specific online search, focusing specifically on "African American hair installations" or "Black hair installations." Well, there wasn't much to find... in fact, there wasn't anything to find, and, as I am seeing more and more, museums, articles and books will be my best resource in this little-explored area of artistic installation experience (at least from what I have seen).

However, I found some sites that mave prove to be valuable resources:

1. Exploring mathematical patterns in braiding: http://www.math.buffalo.edu/mad/special/gilmer-gloria_HAIRSTYLES.html
2. Article on the Politics of Hair: http://www.naani.com/off_the_top_of_your_head.htm
3. More articles on that same site: http://www.naani.com/
4. General Site with tons of links to other sites to explore: http://www.modernmuslima.com/beauty.htm

Looking into artists....

2005-02-28T20:14:00.000-08:00

So, I have begun my search into artists and artwork that has explored similar subject matter. One artist that I was quite impressed by was Lorna Simpson. Though it appears that her more recent work does not focus on black hair, some of her work in the early 1990s focused very closely with it. Coiffure (gelatin prints) and Wigs (waterless lithographs in a collage on a wall) are two strong examples. However, it appears that once again, we are able to look at, but not touch; see, but not immerse; without touch, once again the experience is devoid of intimacy. The viewer can see and interpret, but has a limited connection to the dialogue, which is exacerbated by the fact that the art is subtly personal. It is not to say that the art isn't beautiful; I am very moved by the layered personal expression. My observations speak more to the current presentations I have seen of the subject matter as a whole. The experiences are in written or visual form (or sometimes a blending of the two), but maybe the gap remains because the viewer isn't asked to step out of her comfortable context as an observer.

While at the Studio Museum, some artists that moved me were:

- Wangechi Mutu had a "pin-up series" (2001) that featured women made of a collage of parts, some of which were made of cutout blonde hair and animal prints.
- Lyle Aston Harris has a piece called "Miss America" (1987-88), which featured a black woman with a blurred, ghost-like complexioned face who was wearing an American flag around her neck, leaving the rest of her body bare.
- Kara Walker has a piece called "Emancipation Approximation (scene 18)" (1999-2000), which showed two silhouetted figures (one completely black and once completely white, but both representing black woman). The black silhouette stood in grass with a rag around her head and was holding up the white silhouette, who has an afro and a long, luxurious dress.
- JD Okhai Ojeikere had a piece called "Ogun Pari" (2000), which featured hair in twists, entangled together. I have this artist's book, so I will further explore his work.

While at the museum, I picked up Lorna Simpson's book, as well as another book called "Black Style," which features various fashion and hairstyles in black culture through the centuries, exploring their origins and perceptions.

Museum Hopping Epiphany

2005-02-28T08:45:00.000-08:00

So, on Sunday, Feb 27th, I went to visit the Studio Museum in Harlem to see the Meschac Gaba exhibit called "Tresses." It was quite interesting, but not exactly what I expected. I did enjoy the intricateness of the woven tresses. All of the sculpture was made out of braided, synthetic hair, and was in the form of famous buildings in Manhattan and other parts of the world. It is described as "play[ing] with perceptions of power through North American architecture and West African tradition and style."

On exhibit, the actual "heads" did not contain faces, but looked more like posts, holding up the braided art forms. The web site picture (featured below) made the exhibit appear more like the representation that I am trying to use for my interactive piece, but, at least the Studio Museum of Harlem exhibit, did not use that aesthetic model, so more attention was focused on the elaborate, interwoven sculptures.

Studio Museum of Harlem's site

I was also exposed to other artists who have performed similar work with African-inspired tresses through some of the artist books they had on display. There is one artist in particular who has played with a similar theme (I will comment more on this artist in my next entry), and has taken a thought-provoking stance with it. There is an additional artist in the same vein, but I have already checked out her book from the library (Ojeike).

One thing that I was quite discouraged about when viewing the pieces and looking through the artists’ work was the absence of tactile experience, and how the inability to feel the texture of the work, especially the braided art forms, kept me at a distance, emotionally and cognitively, from the pieces. Part of their appeal was their texture, which appeared to only be half-realized through gaze. Since I was under a quite strong "gaze" by the security staff who flinched at any movements that brought me closer to the pieces, I was unable to experiment with gaining a fuller perspective of the artist's pieces. And, as I gazed through the books, I realized that this distanced experience with the work has similar hindrances, and none of these pieces speak to the immersive element of touch.

This is where I hope that my installation will bridge the gap. There is such a distanced experience through looking and not participating, which is quite similar to the political sentiment in regard to the issue. Maybe this distancing also allows a greater cultural distancing, or am I reading too much?

Faces on my Dining Room Table

2005-02-27T11:19:00.000-08:00

Last week, I decided to go for a walk in my neighborhood of Harlem after seeing a movie in the area with a friend. We started off discussing visiting hair braiding places and filming them in action, possibly finding someone willing to interview with us as she got her hair braided. However, along the way, we found one of a few dozen black hair care places along the strip that prominently displayed wig holding heads, which are both light and inexpensive. I was lured in by the heads, but we quickly were enthralled with the vast array of wigs, and hair care products.

It got me thinking about some of the reading I have done. Some texts have documented the fascination of hair care dating back to the centuries before slavery. Today's climate in regards to African-American hair care is most likely a hybrid of ancient cultural practice: many of our hairstyles, like braiding, require a tremendous amount of hours and dedication, and, in some instances, hair care products. One interesting thing that I read questioned the response that many African-American woman give when confronted with their choice of straightening their hair: "It's just easier to maintain this way." The article questioned if maintenance meant some deeper form of rejection, and possible cultural alienation, since hair care is such an intricate bonding experience in our communities.

So, I ended up purchasing the "heads" and they are now sitting on my dining room table in the living room with their supposedly identical faces looking at me, and egging me on.

Suggestions from a classmate...

2005-02-22T10:27:00.000-08:00

A classmate of mine (Matt) and I have had a few email conversations about our project, and he came up with the wonderful suggestion that I should leave the camera with the person who is divulging her personal story. I have been struggling with how I want the story told, and I was trying to depart from the typical documentary dialogue, but I also think that it will be a good starting point for the installation. I hope that, for a future version of this, I challenge the approach, so that it becomes even more of a personal experience for the user of the installation. I am afraid that having someone tell her own personal story will seem too alienating, since it is such a typical scenario. My hope was to bring someone into the experience more, such that it could become their own personal experience, even for those few moments, and bridge a very important gap. I hope that a more traditional approach can achieve this as well.

As I suggested to Matt, I think a free-write, free-draw will help both of us. I think it will assist him with his storyline, and I think it can also help me with how to convey my project in the best possible way... This is something I will need to do soon. I hope that the suggestion will also be useful for him.

Reading Curly on a Train

2005-02-22T09:29:00.000-08:00

This morning, to my delight, I saw an older woman (who was possibly black or latina) with cropped, curly hair reading a book whose name seemed to be " Curly." I think that there was more to the title, but I could not see the entire thing. Her daughter was sitting next to her, sleeping on her shoulder. On the back panel of the book, it read "Our curly, ourselves." It was such an interesting thing to see so early in the morning, and so on topic!

Feeling stuffy on a Saturday

2005-02-21T12:01:00.000-08:00

So, this past weekend, I spend most of my Saturday at the library. I think that this will be the fate of most of my weekends to come! I was surprised to find that the library did not have as many books as I expected on the subject. For the subject of "black" or "african-american" hair, I only found 5 entries, and two of them were for one book. The most notable book on this area of research was actually checked out, so I have to wait until the end of February. I was shocked to find that two leading books in this area were actually not in the library's holdings at all: Dreads and Tenderheaded. Luckily, I have the second one, but I need to look in the bookstores (or at the public library) for the first, since I do not have a lot of readings on that topic.

I also looked into books on the psychology of touch and installations involving hair (I still have not checked out MOMA as Tom suggested, so I should plan to do that soon, since he has indicated that there is an installation with a wall of hair exhibit there).

Books I checked out:

1. Ojeikere Photographs (a book of images of black hair)
2. African-Carribbean Hair Dressing (mostly on hair care, but it could have a few gems)
3. Touching: Human Significance of ... (I have not really looked at this yet, but the discription sounded good)
4. Visual Reading & Braille Reading (this is also a research book on the psychology of touch)
5. Hair in African Art & Culture
6. Hair Sculpture and its Roots: 36th Annual Contemporary American Art Exhibition (I found this very interesting since it looks at hair sculpture from its traditional roots in African culture, and does very strange and intriguing hair styles in the present... I have to read more of the book since, so far, I have mostly just skimmed through.)
7. World of Wigs, Weaves and Extensions (This one was not what I expected, though I coould possibly find something in here of use)

Other books/video recordings to look into:
1. Black Hair: Art, Style, Culture (this book was out, and will be brought back at the end of February)
2. Plaited Glory (this book appeared to be missing, but I am very interested to see what it has to say and what it's about)
3. Hair Piece [videorecording] (this is at Avery Fischer, and I plan to watch it sometime this week)

So, in order to catch up with my timeline, I have to start writing this week, and this will in volve fulfilling my goal for the timeline that I set aside for last week, which was "read, read, read." I have been reading, but not enough. It is time to start my freewrites, further reading and writing it out "part 1"!

An interface sketch....

2005-02-15T08:36:00.000-08:00

In this sketch, as you can see, there are two mannequin heads, which various hairstyles (only two are shown here, but there would be 4-5). When the user comes and touches them, this is when the interaction will occur. The whole setup will be reminiscent to a barbershop or wig shop, from the inside. The interaction will occur as if on the other side of the glass (in the "real world"), where those that live the experience tell their stories....

Visualizing the Interface....

2005-02-14T22:53:00.000-08:00

For the most part, I think I have a solid idea of what I would like the interface to be. I think that the hard part for me will be deciding what I want the interactive video feed to say or do. I have toyed with various ideas in my head. One of them involves hearing personal stories that can change and become positive with a longer duration of interaction (see "The Talk"). Another idea is to have the experiences with the hair felt intimately, but I think that that will be hard to execute in a way that isn't silly. This is where I am finding the most difficulty, but I think I had better come up with a solid idea soon, since, according to my timeline, I need to start shooting soon!

The Divide between Us

2005-02-10T13:09:00.000-08:00

The other day, I was speaking with a close, black female friend who is older and I respect very much. We were talking about various issues, and then we got onto the subject of a woman who we don't feel likes me that well for a reason that we couldn't quite pinpoint. She smiled and said, "oh well, it's probably because of that good hair, light-skinned thing you've got. You know that's always an issue with us." The "us" meaning "we black women."

Then we started talking about our personal experiences with skin and hair issues, and the darker, or curlier haired women we had negative experiences with, because of what we thought was this issue. Being as we are both black women from the "lighter" end of the spectrum, it was quite an interesting bonding experience that spanned a generational gap (she is about two to three times my age).

So, then I started reflecting on an essay I had read by a white female named Laura Sullivan, who commenting on black hair in its many forms in her essay "A Rio Crime."

"As a white woman, this disturbs me. I don't enjoy being the object of the dominant culture's definition of beauty. It hurts all us women , and makes me the object of many black women's resentment. In this and other ways, Western culture insidiously keeps us powerless by keeping us women separate from one another, so we don't build coalitions across race lines. Instead, we are positioned to see each other as enemies, or as potential competitors in the quest to snag a 'good man.'"

While she is coming from the standpoint of a white woman, who feels that society has created a rift between her and black women because of beauty standards and ideals, her statement sounds very similar to that of many black women who have lighter skin or less curly hair, and who often find themselves in situations where these attributes that are so much closer to our social sense of white beauty end up making them isolated or distanced from other black women in their community. My friend and I found ourselves in this situation for much of our lives. Sometimes this meant that attractive men would single you out as more beautiful than the rest of your friends, causing a rift in close relationships. Sometimes this would mean that other black women, especially those that are older and influential, would state your "good" attributes (of skin and hair) as more appealing in the presence of other impressionable minds who did not have the same texture or skin color. Sometimes this would mean that you would know exactly why another black woman would not like you, even before speaking with you.

However, the division is there, and the only power that we have to overcome this parting in our communities, and in our culture as a whole, is to address it, and to become aware of it.

Sullivan goes on to state that:
"My desire to understand the realities of black women's hair care stems not from some voyeuristic position of privilege and judgement, but rather from the recognition that learning about people in identity positions different from our own, and seeing how the oppression of that group functions, are crucial steps for those of us positioned on the oppressor end of the spectrum. That way we may have the awareness to stop participating in that oppression as much as possible, and to work in tandem with other groups to end it."

The last part of her comment is very true. Only awareness will help us overcome. Images have so much power, and can say so much without uttering anything at all, and, it is mostly through these images, that we, as women of color, have internalized our need to be different. Why is it that when we are afraid to make waves, the first thing we do is pull back our hair or flatten it out in some way, so that it is out of the way, not free to make all sorts of sordid statements? But it's just hair, right, so why is it so offensive?

I'm hoping that my project can do just this: through "showing," I hope that those across racial and cultural lines will begin to see our story take form, and connect its relevance within the social and political fabric of our culture. It is, hopefully, through this connection that we can start to see change.

There are so many questions to answer, and positions to hear, and stories to learn about....

Untangling my hair... hurts....

2005-02-10T10:08:00.000-08:00

So, this whole process of reading and researching and standing before my peers in my thesis class has been like untangling my hair: you may feel accomplished in the end, but, boy does it hurt as you are going through all of it. There is always double-meaning in life and what affects you in it, but some experiences make you more aware of their power to affect you than others, and this one is one of them. I assume that I should not feel as emotional as I do about my project, but it is hard not to. I feel like I am scraping off old wounds and coming to class bleeding. At the same time, however, it is a catharsis, and the duality of my experience is like something I read by bell hooks in her essay "Straightening Our Hair":

"The beauty parlor was a space of consciousness raising, a space where black women shared life stories -- hardships, trials, gossip; a place where one could be comforted and one's spirit renewed... These positive empowering implications of the ritual of pressing mediate but do not change negative implications. They exist alongside all that is negative."

Research of Images....

2005-02-08T09:55:00.000-08:00

In my timeline, I think I need to alter some of my next steps to reflect image research. I would like to not just research texts but images through time as well, because some of the images I have encountered recently.....

Hudson River Museum

2005-02-08T09:10:00.000-08:00

Apparently, the Hudson River Museum is going to have an exhibit on black hair that I should explore. In fact, it seems like this month will be a valuable resource for me all around town, since it is black history month, and all of the discussions are coming to the forefront right now...

http://www.hrm.org/

Right now, I can't find it on their website, but i was told (by my dad) that I should probably get their calendar directly from the musem...

Liubo's Comments

2005-02-08T08:31:00.000-08:00

A classmate of mine was asked to explore my concept and bring his experience and ideas to it. I was quite interested in what he had to say, particularly since he wasn't aware that hairstyle has such significance in the black community. Here are his comments:

"hi, i've been thinking about black hair all week that's why it took me such a long time to send you comments. my comments are not really comments, but questions but i imagine it'll be useful to get an idea of what clueless people like me would ask you or themselves when confronted with the thesis.

off the cuff, among the external characteristics that define cultural and ethnic identity i would not have put hair near the top. instead, since hair can be cut and processed in so many ways, i'd would have considered it on the top of the list of fashion statements. i guess things become relevant to your thesis when en masse fashion statements start defining cultural identity...

i mean ideally, historical baggage aside, hair should not be much different than eye or skin color as far as fashion is concerned. there are certain types of hair for which some treatments will work and others won't. likewise some colors of clothing, make up etc work differently for different skin or eye color. it is hard to imagine that there is bad hair and good hair from the start, the same way it is unacceptable to say there is bad or good skin color. i think the way racism works is that you pick a characteristic that distinguishes you from the other and then you declare it a clear sign of inferiority. but perhaps i'm simplifying things too much.

i've been watching 'girlfriends' on upn all week (for research of course). in support of your abstract observation, i noticed that all the girlfriends have very nice and sleek hair (joan is curly though and the crazy hippie girl, whatshername, lin?, has wavy hair) but i honestly can't tell and don't know if it's easy or hard to for them to maintain their hair like that or whether their hairstyles are enforced by the oppressive establishment: i did notice that kelsey grammar is the the executive producer of girlfriends, interesting choice since he also portrayed sideshow bob on the simpsons who sported a very extravagant hairdo unlike grammar in real life. but i digress, it's 3am, good luck, i'm very curious to see where you're going with this."

An Artist to Explore

2005-02-08T08:16:00.000-08:00

My father sent me a link today of an artist who describes himself and his work as such:

"As a photographer, my mission is to confront stereotypes and redefine the visual document as it relates to people on the margins of society. There are many ways to approach change. I document potentially what it means to be decent, dignified and virtuous, rather than negation."

He seems like someone I should look into since I am finding similarities in how we are describing our aims. I was particularly interested in this part of his web site:

http://www.chesterhiggins.com/portfolios.html

Our stories....

2005-02-07T21:59:00.000-08:00

So, I have started reading one book called "Tenderheaded," which is a collection of black women's stories, and the words are moving and powerful... It is amazing to hear what other women have to say about a subject that it so close to home... For now, I think I will delve into the personal stories, before I start getting into the "historical" reference material, because my project is all about the personal nature of the issue in the broader political context.

I also would like to go to the extent of just speaking with other women about their stories and ideas, with or without the background knowledge, and see what they have to say...

Significance of Touch....

2005-02-06T23:34:00.000-08:00

So, as I was driving today (for four hours from my weekend trip to my hometown), I started thinking about my projects, as long drives at night on long stretches of highway will tend to do, and I started thinking about "touch." This seems to be the bridging point of my project -- something that other forms of current expression on the topic don't seem to have as a linkage point (I'm sure that someone out there has a link to touch, but I am speaking in terms of current media, as it addresses the topic). I have seen photographs, read essays, watched documentaries, but touch has so much power and significance. There are people that we don't dare touch, because of their stature (whether we are intimidated because of their power or repulsed because of their lack of it), and there are those that we feel so deeply connected to that touch is the ultimate way to express closeness. So, can touch really bridge my gap? I think that I should not just read about cultural theory, but also the meaning of "touch."

I also read something recently that sparked my thought as it relates to my subject. bell hooks, an accomplished black feminist, wrote about the fascination of black hair to non-blacks, who often request to "touch" the hair in its curly or "kinky" or "coarse" state to see what it feels like and "show surprise that the texture is soft or feels good."

I need to explore how the connection to touching the hair and experiencing our experience will work... It is so loaded....

A friend of my father....

2005-02-05T00:57:00.000-08:00

So, I had an interesting email conversation with a friend of my father, who has apparently explored the topic as a focus on cultural and political theory, and he gave me some directions to pursue, including a close female family friend, who I am sure will have some ideas on the topic. He did bring up the difference in the decades, which I was quite surprised about, but also brings to mind something that I will need to address. Being as he is from my parents generation, he has seen the evolution of images and acceptance from a different perspective than me, and I will need to do research to see how others see this as well.... Very interesting.

Timeline

2005-02-04T17:09:00.000-08:00

Now it is time to buckle down and come up with a timeline for my thesis concept creation and physical representation:

Feb 8 - 15 = Research: Find relevant articles, papers and books; narrow down relevant texts
Feb 15 - 22 = Read, Read, Read; Further narrow down texts and substantiate idea
Feb 22 - Mar 1 = Time to write it out (part I): Write at least 10 pages and look into additional research & directions
Mar 1 - 8 = By now I should have enough information to start forming a solid idea of visuals for my project. This is when I will start shooting my video interactions. I will also continue writing and research.
Mar 8 - 15 = Writing, Part II: I hope to have most of the thesis paper finalized, and I will start revising and reviewing it.
Mar 15 - 22 = Finish taking video & start editing. Writing, Part III: Wrap-up.
Mar 22 - 29 = All video segments should be fully edited. Time to start constructing interaction, and piecing everything together on paper. Writing, Part IV: Final edit.
Mar 29 - Apr 5 = Getting physical objects for installation & Programming interactions
Apr 5 - 12 = Putting installation together, part I
Apr 12 - 19 = Putting installation together, part I
Apr 19 - 26 = Finalize and debug installation / Review Writing once more
Apr 26 - May 3 = Everything is finalized; Get feedback from family, friends and outside evaluators.
May 3 = Presentation.....

Research: Some places to Start.....

2005-02-01T08:47:00.000-08:00

Here are some mainstream reads that I plan to start my journey with:

1. Hair Story : Untangling the Roots of Black Hair in America
2. Tenderheaded : A Comb-Bending Collection of Hair Stories
3. Hair Matters: Beauty, Power, and Black Women's Consciousness
4. Dreads

However, I have a long way to go, and these are only a start. I am sure that there is much more to uncover in the library databases, which is the next step I will take, along with following the advice of friends and family and following some of the connections that have sent me.

The Talk

2005-02-01T07:33:00.000-08:00

Last night, I had a rather in-depth conversation with my father who provided a tremendous amount of insight into my idea. Being as he is quite new to the concept of interactive technology, I found his grasp of what I wanted to do rather amazing. He provided the right amount of insight, challenging my thought process as well as how I plan to prototype it visually and physically. I am still working on what I will show with the interactive content, which he gave some good criticism on. I have a lot to work on here, but I really like a lot of the ideas, many of which I had not thought of before, about what stories will be told, or what ideas I want to bring across. Also, I was happy that we both agreed that it needs to be SHOWN, not TOLD -- the idea needs to envelop the user, not patronize them.

One idea that he had that really struck me was to possibly change the interaction positive the longer that the hair is touched. This could open up a gateway if someone really has the desire to hear and experience, and it could open an avenue to a dialogue of healing.

However, he is completely right that I need to fully grasp the concepts (and the appropriate rhetoric that describes them) on this subject, because it is such a deep reaching one that others have achieved a firmer understanding on. This is where my research comes in. I plan to contact one of the people he has referred me to, as well as start researching those who have really delved into this topic thus far.

It was great having his support on this, though. This weekend, my mom and I will discuss this at length as well, and I am sure that she has a lot of great insight on the matter as well.

My Thesis Question....

2005-01-25T16:05:00.000-08:00

Can an interactive, immersive environment (simulated through a video installation) increase the experience of the user such that the user is able to transcend the boundaries of his or her own social context, or, at least come closer to doing so as the user would be able to with traditional media?

Personal Statement: Who am I, really?

2005-01-25T10:15:00.000-08:00

At a very young age, I became aware of how critical the definition of race, culture and beauty are intertwined within the strands of hair, in all of its forms, but, most apparently within the context of curly hair. As a daughter of a first-generation American, French-Canadian, white mother, and an African-American father, both, at the time, actively involved in the civil-rights movement, I was always finding myself caught in the cultural “hair” war, and how it defined my racial and cultural identity.
My mother and my father wanted me to define myself as a young woman of color, and, while my skin color always left me open to cultural and racial identification, my hair, being curly enough to hold a solid afro, was my defining mantra toward black acceptance, and, as such, I was encouraged to use it to label my cultural classification.
However, as blissfully happy as I was with my curly locks and their ability to hold such a commanding form, I was very unaware of the political significance of such a decision, and its social implications. While most children my age found themselves in similar states of blissful ignorance of social stigma, and chose to accept me, locks and all, it was those few incidents, when exposed to older children, that tore at my self-esteem and forced me to question my ideas of confidence and beauty, especially as it related to my hair.
My first incident occurred when I was four or five with an older white child (probably eight or nine years old), who came near my daycare facility while my friends and I were playing in the yard, and singled me out to tell me how everyone “in the neighborhood” thought I was “ugly with that hair.” However, I became acutely aware that it was not just white little girls who found my hair hideous when, very soon after, I was told by women of color that I should accept my “prettiness” and get rid of my ugly hair.
Of course, my immediate reaction was to straighten my hair and, thus, become socially embraced by my peers, who increasingly expressed the same ideas of beauty. I begged for a straight perm, which was frowned upon by my parents; they eventually gave into demands, but only allowed it to be done once or twice a year, which left me with curly roots and subsequent battles over beauty in the interim. This lasted well into my teens.
The interesting thing was I found myself facing a variety of beauty standards and social definitions depending on my hair. I found that when my hair was straight or pulled back enough to not notice the texture of its kinkiness, I was perceived as culturally Hispanic as well as socially more attractive. When my hair was in braids, I would be perceived as culturally African-American, and socially mixed in terms of attractiveness. However, I found that, no matter what, curly was always perceived as offensive or ugly. In more recent times, this definition has changed somewhat, but no matter the circumstances, curly, and its offspring (i.e., locks, Afros, etc.) are always politically perceived, and forces the wearer to justify its usage, within and outside of the African-American community.
Cultural acceptance has always been a hurdle for me because of my racial mixture, but, more noticeably, because of my choice in hair texture. I wish to uncover why hair is such a dramatic choice in the context of social definition, and to bring the often-unrecognized struggle (by those who must make the choice and those that don’t) to the forefront of consciousness.

Am I Proving Something?

2005-01-24T21:02:00.000-08:00

Through interactive technology, I hope to bridge the gap of cultural understanding into the psyche of black woman-ness. The act of touching and being immersed into the stories/experiences can achieve more than reading cultural theory or watching documentaries about cultural definition through aesthetic appearance.

Abstract

2005-01-18T16:39:00.000-08:00

American Black women have been grappling with their "roots" for the length of colonialism, and, unfortunately, despite the civil rights and "black power" movements, not much has significantly changed the prevailing beauty standards within the black community in recent times, especially when it comes to hair. While fads, such as the Afro, Locks and, even to an extent, the Jerry Curl, have had some short-term success with encouraging women to redefine what constitutes "beautiful" hair, the prevailing, socially-accepted standard still dictates that black hair stay as close to straight as possible, and one can only begin to question the psychological effects of such an acceptance. My thesis aims to bridge together the organic qualities of hair with the immersive experience of interactive video to delve into the psyche of a black woman, and allow the user to see the inherent political and personally defining nature of hair choice in the black community and the culture at large.